Dear reader,
This week, in one of my honors classes, my professor asked us to freewrite about 3 topics:
- Nature
- Childhood
- Home
For childhood, I wrote the following:
I don't recall much of childhood. At a young age, I moved away from my parents to the city for education. Always working towards getting better grades. Not much playing except for with my elder brother and his friends sometimes. I think I'd change things if I could, but then, if not for the exact childhood I had, would I even be who I am? Probably not. Hence, I will not change a thing.
There have been multiple instances when I've been glad that I matured much faster than my peers. I was glad that I was always thinking about the future and, as a result, started learning skills early on.
However, there have also been times when I've wished things were different.
It would've been nice if I were able to experience more of what other kids did, in terms of playing, I mean. If I'm honest, I'll have to admit that I brought this on myself.
Nobody asked me to grow up; I wanted to become responsible and independent.
Growing up fast might be the reason why, even now, I struggle to just be present. I'm always working towards the future to provide for my family and take care of my parents.
That's something I might have to overcome. Not necessarily to not think about the future at all, but to find a balance perhaps. To be able to be present in moments without the constant worry of the future.
Let's see how that goes.
I'll see you next week.
Warmly,
Suraj